Cancer has a way of making one look back at life. The one person who I wished was here with me thru this journey has been gone for years and only comes to me in my dreams. The one that is still alive has not taken time from work to be physically with me during all these difficult treatments. Phone calls and cards are nice but I don’t know how to tell him how special it would be to actually feel a hug.I go to my treatments alone and some days I question how I can keep going thru these treatments.I push myself to keep going. But it is so hard. People do not see my struggle inside me.